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Social Commerce Accountants
The accountant you need to…

Unfck
your books

We’ll fix your accounts within 30 days or you can tell us to FCK OFF.

Specialist eCommerce accounting for £1m–£20m brands selling on Shopify, Amazon and TikTok Shop. Get your books straight and understand what you’re actually making.

Let’s unfck them

Book a fit call with Sam. Talk through the problem and the next step.

YOUR FIRST CONVERSATIONReal person.
Straight answers.Sam Hoye
Founder, SCA
Sam Hoye, founder of Social Commerce Accountants
THE WORK, MADE VISIBLE
FROM LOOSE ENDSTO JOINED-UP BOOKS
01
Sales & settlementsMapped to the ledger
02
Fees & refundsTraced to the evidence
03
Stock & cost of salesA clear basis for margin
Reconciled records. Reporting you can explain.

Illustration of the process — not client data or a completed assessment.

BUILT AROUND YOUR CHANNELS
ShopifyamazonTikTok Shop
Sales → settlements → books
RECOGNISE THIS?

The business is growing.
The books aren’t keeping up.

You need more than a bank balance to know how the business is doing.

01 / CASH

The payout arrived.
The story didn’t.

You can see cash coming in, but can’t trace it back to sales, fees and refunds.

02 / PROFIT

Revenue looks good.
Margin is a guess.

Your channel reports and P&L disagree. Stock movements make it harder to see why.

03 / CONTROL

More channels.
More loose ends.

The process that worked before now struggles with more currencies, settlements and stock.

WHAT YOU GET BACK

Books you can use.
Answers you can act on.

A defined clean-up with a practical handover. Your proposal sets out the records, periods and deliverables covered.

  1. A clear correction trail

    What changed, why it changed and what is still outstanding.

  2. Reconciliations with evidence

    Relevant balances tied to supporting records, with review notes and limitations.

  3. Management numbers explained

    A walkthrough of the reporting, assumptions and issues that affect your decisions.

  4. A process your team can keep running

    Close tasks, named owners and a handover conversation. Ongoing support scoped separately.

HOW WE UNFCK THEM

Blunt names.
Proper accounting.

Six stages. A real output at every step. From finding the problem to keeping it fixed.

  1. 01

    Scope out the fckery.

    Map your channels, accounting stack and outstanding periods. Follow sales, settlements, fees, refunds and stock into the books.

    YOU LEAVE WITHA diagnostic and evidence request.
  2. 02

    Tell you how fcked you are.

    Get the findings in plain English: what is wrong, why it matters and what needs attention first. Agree the work before corrections begin.

    YOU LEAVE WITHFindings, an agreed scope, quote and timetable.
  3. 03

    Unfck the books.

    Correct the agreed issues, resolve missing or duplicated entries and rebuild the connections between source records and the ledger.

    YOU LEAVE WITHDocumented corrections and an issues log.
  4. 04

    Check the hell out of it.

    Reconcile the relevant balances to supporting records. A second person reviews the corrections; unresolved items stay visible.

    YOU LEAVE WITHReconciliations and review notes.
  5. 05

    Make the numbers make sense.

    Turn the corrected records into useful management numbers. Walk through what they mean, the assumptions and any remaining limitations.

    YOU LEAVE WITHManagement reporting and a practical handover.
  6. 06

    Keep the fckery out.

    Agree who checks what, when the books close and how exceptions get resolved. Ongoing support is scoped separately if you want it.

    YOU LEAVE WITHA recurring close checklist with clear owners.

Start with the problem.
We’ll work out the next step together.

Let’s unfck them A fit call first. Any diagnostic work is agreed separately.
WHY NOW?

Something’s changed. Your books need to catch up.

Sam Hoye
Sam HoyeFounder, Social Commerce Accountants

  1. You’ve grown. Your setup hasn’t.

    More orders, more channels, more countries. What worked at £300k is creaking at £3m.

  2. You don’t trust the profit figure.

    Your dashboards say one thing. Your accounts say another. You’re making decisions somewhere in between.

  3. Sales are flying. Cash isn’t.

    You’re selling more, but still wondering where the money’s gone.

  4. Your stock numbers don’t add up.

    The warehouse, inventory system and accounts aren’t telling the same story.

  5. VAT has become a worry.

    Overseas sales, new marketplaces or old returns you’re no longer confident about.

  6. You’re raising money. Or planning an exit.

    Someone’s about to look closely at the numbers. You’d rather find the problems first.

  7. You’ve inherited a mess.

    You’ve bought a business, changed finance teams or lost the person who knew how everything worked.

  8. You’re tired of being behind.

    Another month closes. The backlog grows. You still haven’t got numbers you can use.

Whatever brought you here, let’s work out what needs fixing.

Talk to Sam
BEFORE YOU BOOK

Fair questions.
Straight answers.

Clear scope. Agreed fees.
A sensible first conversation.

Do I have to change accountant?

No. We can work alongside your accountant, bookkeeper or internal team. We agree access, responsibilities and the handover with you.

Is this a clean-up or ongoing bookkeeping?

This is a scoped clean-up of the agreed issues and periods. You receive the corrections, reconciliations and handover set out in your proposal. Ongoing bookkeeping or reporting is a separate conversation.

What will it cost?

The work depends on your channels, records, periods and the issues found. We agree any diagnostic fee before the diagnostic starts, then define and quote the clean-up. Booking a fit call does not commit you to that work.

What happens after I book?

You speak with Sam about your channels, accounting setup and what is not adding up. The call establishes whether we are a fit and the sensible next step. It is not a detailed review of your records. Any diagnostic, access and document requests are agreed afterwards.

What should I bring to the call?

Your sales channels, accounting software, the periods you are concerned about and a short description of what feels wrong. You do not need to send accounting files to book.

What does the 30-day promise cover?

This is a private review draft. The commercial terms for the 30-day promise are still being agreed and must be settled before this offer is released.

LET’S GET YOUR BOOKS STRAIGHT

Less “what the fck?”
More “now I get it.”

Tell Sam what’s not adding up.
Find out whether we’re the right people to help.

Let’s unfck them Book a fit call · No accounting files needed to book